I can do this right?!

Once again I keep asking myself this question. I get overwhelmed so much and it is usually when I am by myself. I hope that this overwhelmingness stops soon. It is the loneliness that gets me, it is the stress of doing it on my own that gets me, it is the budgeting, money, house issues, taking care of the animals, taking care of me, using everything I already have and not buying stuff cause I want it that gets to me, wondering what Larry is doing that gets to me, watching Food Revolution by myself and wondering if Larry would be on board with the kids eating healthier that gets to me, being alone gets to me, housework gets to me, silence gets to me, screaming kids gets to me and so much more. Some hours I wonder if I can even do this and some hours I just say bring it. I just want this weekend to be done and next week to be done I don't like any of this and I didn't bring it on myself I just want what I had and what was taken from me. And I know I can't have it back because it has been ruined and Larry isn't on board to fix it. I just want to be happy and I want to make sure I can do this all right. Why is it what Larry decided to do makes my whole life have to change when I didn't even know it was going on? I just hope I can do this and I keep asking myself if I even can. I have to be the stronger person and there is alot on my shoulders and I don't even want it to be. This day is halfway done and than it will be Mother's day. I got to make it through that holiday and it used to be a happy day and I am going to try my best to make it a happy day I have two beautiful children that call me mommy that make it a special day for me it is just the one person that makes it even better and shows me that I am a good mother will probably not even give acknowledge me on this day. That is what makes me sad.